Do I have reasons to live? Committing suicide?

Since November 1st, 1993 I have lived a lie that I can no longer go on with. I have started each of the last 6478 days by convincing myself that McDonald's would bring back the Double ZestaBurger--if only for a limited time and at only select locations. It was the only way I could get myself out of bed and through the day.



I can no longer lie to myself about my future. I now accept that it is bleak. I do not control my destiny, nor my happiness. Like all of you, I am just a pawn in McDonald's global marketing plan. The same company that has returned the McRib 643 limited times in the last 17 years has never given my well-being a second thought.



Well, congratulations, you win. You have killed my will, spirit and soul; now my body will follow.



Luckily, I will be going to a better place. A place where my happiness won't be controlled by a multi-national conglomeration of fry cooks in cheap suits. While my body will be buried in the same ground where Ray Kroc's is surely spinning; my soul will be with his in heaven. Not here in purgatory controlled by the whims of MBA's from Hamburger U.



Together Ray and I will forever feast on that delicious ambrosia, the Double Zesta Burger.Do I have reasons to live? Committing suicide?
Cool story bro.
Live! Don't kill yourself. If you don't like the job, get a new one. Find a hobby you like and have fun there, that won't cost too much if you don't have much money. I found knitting and a favourite book series.

There are usually people around you that would be upset if you did go, saving yourself will make them happier, you don't want them feeling the same way?Do I have reasons to live? Committing suicide?
This. Is. Beautiful.
Better not to eat certain foods.The best dish in the world is a good plate of spaghetti with tomato sauce and parmesan.See how eating certain hamburg ends badlyDo I have reasons to live? Committing suicide?
Nope. Sorry.
Since it's suicide, you'll probably go to hell. And they only serve Big N' Tastys in hell.
That is indeed quite a set back in life. If I were a burger buff I'm not sure I could deal with it either. Perhaps you could learn how to make the Double ZestaBurger yourself, in your own kitchen, get a friend to serve it to you and say, "you want fries with that?"
Perhaps a letter from yourself to McDonald's HQ, as impassioned as the one you have here would get a response.
Maybe you could join the Marines and go off to the middle east. Dodging bullets and IED's might take your mind off your loss.
And I know this is sacrilege, but consider switching to chicken. An even bigger perversion, perhaps take up meditation and become vegan. Drastic times call for drastic measures.
Best wishes.

jeopardy game